❤The Sixth Month❤

The Sixth-month, it feels like just yesterday it all happened. I thought, it would be a better year ahead, but it wasn't. Ain't want to think negatively, but it's just the fact right in front of my eyes. Consequence that I need to bear from my own actions. I wonder if I'm trying to live the life that people are trying to create for me, ain't the life that I wanted. What do I want then?
I always thought that it will be different, but somehow it wasn't the truth. I'm just lying to myself.  Money can't buy happiness, just temporal satisfaction. I don't need temporal satisfaction, just a support that I can get in everything that I do. Too much rules that I need to follow in order for what I've chosen. This ain't what I wanted. A world without boundaries.
Failing isn't in my dictionary but failing has come to reality. I couldn't give out the best in me, NO!!! It's not that, I DIDN'T give out the best in me. 2011 is a disastrous year. Like how it goes, I'd go back to December all the time. Somehow it's just a wishful thinking. It's not something that I can change.

*****Just as the Dead Rose*****

Love,

Alyssa Cross

~xoxo~

❤My Guardian Angel❤

Exactly six weeks that you have left, it will all remain as a memory to me. Couldn't get used to everyday life without you. From time to time, I think of you. One night, I saw Grandmama and Grandpapa, waving at me with a wide smile. Telling me everything's gonna be alright. Nothing to be worry about anymore. There is no longer pain and suffering. Just happiness for being together right now. I still couldn't accept the fact that yer gone now. I miss both of you dearly. Your goodness, being adorable, never bored of listening and talking to me, as the most wonderful kind-hearted person. Every time when I see you walking out of the room, it is like a peek-a-boo. Every late night when I got home, I would look through the windows just to watch you sleep soundly. All that I no longer have or can do. What is life gonna be like without you? The Queen of My Heart.

You've always been my guardian angel even now that I no longer have you. You never leave but continue with your job as a protector to me. How naive could I be, not knowing that it is the lowest point of life when I took my first step out of your circle of life. Telling me that I will always be your Princess, deep down inside I knew that there is no other love in world I could find again. The most precious that I ever have, My Guardian Angel. Now and forever.

I am responsible for my own choice and action. Now that I understand, love isn't about being together but seeing one being happy. My lost can never be replaced.

*****Journey ahead of me*****

Love,

Alyssa Cross

~xoxo~